The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there then the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
5 posters
Chuck Norris Jokes...
J cenami13- Posts : 36
Join date : 2009-02-18
Age : 28
Location : here
- Post n°51
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... a suicide.
The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there then the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there then the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
Admin- Admin
- Posts : 35
Join date : 2009-02-13
Age : 38
- Post n°52
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Chuck Norris speaks in all caps.
Chuck Norris was once in a knife fight, and the knife lost.
Chuck Norris was once in a knife fight, and the knife lost.
J cenami13- Posts : 36
Join date : 2009-02-18
Age : 28
Location : here
- Post n°53
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
The leading causes of death in the United States are:
1. heart disease
2. Chuck Norris
3. Cancer
Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody mentions the twelfth ingredient: fear
1. heart disease
2. Chuck Norris
3. Cancer
Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody mentions the twelfth ingredient: fear
Admin- Admin
- Posts : 35
Join date : 2009-02-13
Age : 38
- Post n°54
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Nice, I saw this video on there too..
http://www.hulu.com/watch/1478/saturday-night-live-snl-digital-short-young-chuck-norris
Chuck Norris' pulse is measured on the richter scale.
http://www.hulu.com/watch/1478/saturday-night-live-snl-digital-short-young-chuck-norris
Chuck Norris' pulse is measured on the richter scale.
J cenami13- Posts : 36
Join date : 2009-02-18
Age : 28
Location : here
- Post n°55
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Hey go onto google and type in the 12 days of Chuck Norris.
On the first day of Christmas Chuck Norris gave to me only one second to flee.
On the first day of Christmas Chuck Norris gave to me only one second to flee.
Admin- Admin
- Posts : 35
Join date : 2009-02-13
Age : 38
- Post n°56
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Chuck Norris once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.
Godzilla is a Japanese rendition of Chuck Norris' first visit to Tokyo.
Godzilla is a Japanese rendition of Chuck Norris' first visit to Tokyo.
J cenami13- Posts : 36
Join date : 2009-02-18
Age : 28
Location : here
- Post n°57
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
If superman and The Flash were to race to the edge of space Chuck Norris would be the winner.
Althought it is not common knowledge there are actually three sides to the force the light side the dark side and Chuck Norris
Althought it is not common knowledge there are actually three sides to the force the light side the dark side and Chuck Norris
ShellyJ- Posts : 5
Join date : 2009-03-03
Age : 56
Location : Weatherford or Clinton, OK probably
- Post n°58
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Chuck Norris would want to be a pharmacist to make money of course! Round house kicking doesn't earn much these days...
J cenami13- Posts : 36
Join date : 2009-02-18
Age : 28
Location : here
- Post n°59
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
hey Shelly thats great but why would Chuck Norris want to be a phamasist?
The opening scene of the movie 'Saving Private Ryan' is loosely based on games of dodge ball Chuck Norris played in second grade.
The continents didn't drift apart they heard Chuck Norris was going to be in America so they all ran away.
The opening scene of the movie 'Saving Private Ryan' is loosely based on games of dodge ball Chuck Norris played in second grade.
The continents didn't drift apart they heard Chuck Norris was going to be in America so they all ran away.
Admin- Admin
- Posts : 35
Join date : 2009-02-13
Age : 38
- Post n°60
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Nice one Shelly, nice picture too, I bet you can't top my pic though! I though I would wear a bag over my head when burning trash and I tripped and fell in the fire...then had someone take a picture...
ShellyJ- Posts : 5
Join date : 2009-03-03
Age : 56
Location : Weatherford or Clinton, OK probably
- Post n°61
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Did you know that Chuck Norris wanted to be a pharmacist? He was so dumb that I flunked him out of my class three times so now he just has to roundhouse kick people to take out his frustration!
Admin- Admin
- Posts : 35
Join date : 2009-02-13
Age : 38
- Post n°62
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Very nice picture, I like it!
Do you know how giraffes were born? Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a horse in the neck!
Do you know how giraffes were born? Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a horse in the neck!
J cenami13- Posts : 36
Join date : 2009-02-18
Age : 28
Location : here
- Post n°63
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Hey Travis I got a better picture.
When Chuck norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
When Chuck norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
Admin- Admin
- Posts : 35
Join date : 2009-02-13
Age : 38
- Post n°64
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Hey guys I updated more of the site, go to the green room upcoming trips and there is info on the zoo and the past trips you can download a video of them!
Chuck Norris likes to knit sweaters, if by 'knit' you mean kick and by 'sweaters' you mean babies.
Chuck Norris likes to knit sweaters, if by 'knit' you mean kick and by 'sweaters' you mean babies.
J cenami13- Posts : 36
Join date : 2009-02-18
Age : 28
Location : here
- Post n°65
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
No one agrees Jenny because we have so many more. haha
If You have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on google it doesn't say "did you mean Chuck Norris" it says "run before he finds you"
(This one is not like the one if you put Find Chuck Norris into google totaly different)
If You have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on google it doesn't say "did you mean Chuck Norris" it says "run before he finds you"
(This one is not like the one if you put Find Chuck Norris into google totaly different)
jenster- Posts : 7
Join date : 2009-02-22
Age : 41
- Post n°66
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
I stand behind my scrabble joke. Thank you very much.
J cenami13- Posts : 36
Join date : 2009-02-18
Age : 28
Location : here
- Post n°67
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
I agree, everything will be fine as long as Jenny is still in 2nd place!
Chuck Norris put Humpty Dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face. Later Chuck Norris dined on scrambled eggs with all the kings horses and all the kings men. The king himself could not attend for unspecified reasons. Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of the death to be a roundhouse kick in the face. There is only one king.
and I belive Jack wins the picture!!!!!!!!!
Chuck Norris put Humpty Dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face. Later Chuck Norris dined on scrambled eggs with all the kings horses and all the kings men. The king himself could not attend for unspecified reasons. Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of the death to be a roundhouse kick in the face. There is only one king.
and I belive Jack wins the picture!!!!!!!!!
Admin- Admin
- Posts : 35
Join date : 2009-02-13
Age : 38
- Post n°68
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Jenny does win first place in the picture category , or does that mean that Jack wins?
Admin- Admin
- Posts : 35
Join date : 2009-02-13
Age : 38
- Post n°69
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Very well...we are tied (as long as Jenny is 2nd place!) hahaha
Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he stands outside and dares it to grow
I think I figured out the time problem with the posts, before all the times were goofy but now it's all good...I think
Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he stands outside and dares it to grow
I think I figured out the time problem with the posts, before all the times were goofy but now it's all good...I think
J cenami13- Posts : 36
Join date : 2009-02-18
Age : 28
Location : here
- Post n°70
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Okay guys what is up with that and I can't say anyone wins because I have heard all of them already!
Anyway I think we should keep putting Chuck Norris jokes. and if you guys want to fight about it I have something that will make it better, me and Travis are tied for first place and Jenny you are still your second place all better now?
In fine print on the Guinnesss book of world records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris and those in the book are simply the closest anyone has ever gotton.
Anyway I think we should keep putting Chuck Norris jokes. and if you guys want to fight about it I have something that will make it better, me and Travis are tied for first place and Jenny you are still your second place all better now?
In fine print on the Guinnesss book of world records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris and those in the book are simply the closest anyone has ever gotton.
Admin- Admin
- Posts : 35
Join date : 2009-02-13
Age : 38
- Post n°71
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Your scrabble joke is like the least hilarious out of all jokes... and when I saw your post this morning, I saw a button where I can ban you from the forum! You better say I win!! C'mon, orange juice out of a banana?! <that guy is laughing...
jenster- Posts : 7
Join date : 2009-02-22
Age : 41
- Post n°72
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
I'm going to say Jessica wins!! Sorry Trav, she really is the master of Chuck Norris jokes!
but I come in 2nd with my amazing scrabble joke.....right, huh?
but I come in 2nd with my amazing scrabble joke.....right, huh?
J cenami13- Posts : 36
Join date : 2009-02-18
Age : 28
Location : here
- Post n°73
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
A handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and if you park there you will become handicapped.
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross, just never his own
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross, just never his own
Admin- Admin
- Posts : 35
Join date : 2009-02-13
Age : 38
- Post n°74
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
Chuck Norris invented the tooth fairy, as a way to compensate for round house kicking everybody to the face.
Chuck norris can squeeze orange juice from a banana.
Chuck norris can squeeze orange juice from a banana.
J cenami13- Posts : 36
Join date : 2009-02-18
Age : 28
Location : here
- Post n°75
Re: Chuck Norris Jokes...
I think that would be great and your picture is awsome Jenny.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is he always says two seconds till, but by the time you ask two seconds till what he has already roundhouse kicked you in the face.
There is no theory of evelution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is he always says two seconds till, but by the time you ask two seconds till what he has already roundhouse kicked you in the face.
There is no theory of evelution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
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